Keir Starmer, the catastrophic charlatan who has turned Labour’s landslide into a laughing stock faster than you can say “mission-led government”, will be incredibly fortunate if he lasts another six months.

The leadership farce that has engulfed Downing Street since early November is destroying Starmer’s crumbling credibility within his own ranks.

Starmer’s allies, who were manically briefing like deranged arsonists against the Poundland Pet Shop Boy, Wes Streeting, have left the isolated prime minister looking like more of a paranoid weakling than ever before.

The writing is on the wall, Mr Starmer.

Starmer vs Rayner vs Burnham: what a choice

I have no preference for the next Labour leader. Why would I care for the name of the next servant of the elite? The next Labour leader, and prime minister by default, will come from the right wing of the party.

I am seeing Angela Rayner and Andy Burnham being touted as not only the saviours of Britain and the rancid, corrupt Labour Party, but also the saviours of the left.

Britain is a horrible, expensive, racist shit hole, the Labour Party is dead and almost buried, and the left is perfectly capable of destroying itself from within. Absolutely no assistance is required from the two former cabinet minister heavyweights who had a perfectly decent opportunity to prove their left credentials, some time ago.

How did that go?

I must admit, when Starmer came in, I thought he would at least see out one term. The vast but thoroughly undeserved majority should’ve been enough to drag him through five tumultuous years with the likelihood of a smaller majority at the next general election.

Yet here we are, just sixteen disastrous months later, with whispers of rebellion echoing through the lobbies because, surprise, this incompetent, authoritarian nonsense isn’t going down particularly well with MPs and constituents alike.

The Labour government’s latest plans for refugees are so typically vile of what the Labour Party has become.

Vile

Who even is Shabana Mahmood, when she isn’t aping far-right populist rhetoric, ethnically stereotyping an entire nation, and claiming expenses to cover the services of a spin doctor?

Once a darling of Labour’s soft-left, morally-rotten Mahmood’s unveiling of sweeping asylum reforms isn’t just a bit of policy wonkery; it is yet another savage and dangerous pivot to the right, one that’s earning her plaudits from Nigel Farage, Tommy Five Names, and Reform UK goons, all while fracturing Labour’s soul beyond recognition.

Mahmood’s “moral mission” stinks of performative toughness. She invoked her own racism to inoculate herself against charges of stoking division, using her personal trauma as a gagging order on her critics, all while her own policies fan the flames of xenophobia and hatred that she claims to abhor.

A reminder, we are talking about a Labour government here. Whatever happened to international solidarity? Whatever happened to the Labour Party?

Keir Starmer seems to think that ripping off Denmark’s notoriously cruel playbook — confiscating refugees’ property, deporting children, and turning Britain into an “island of strangers” — will appease the bigots in Reform UK. The naivety is utterly astounding.

Starmer’s “battle for the soul of the country” bullshit is simply a very public surrender to Reform’s big lead in the polls.

Starmer and Mahmood, hailing from the ‘soft-left’ of Labour, could not be any clearer. Britain is a country hostile to foreigners.

Jeremy Corbyn nailed it, as he often does. This isn’t progressive. It’s Labour folding like a cheap suit to Farage’s nativism, flushing refugees’ fundamental rights down the toilet for a few red wall votes. And it really is just a few because the right-wing despise the shapeshifter Starmer as much as you or I, believe it or not.

Starmer: mainstreaming the racist

Keir Starmer is mainstreaming the ugliest impulses in British politics, and why? A desperate last-ditch attempt to maintain a grip on the power that he surrendered to left-purger-in-chief McSweeney during the days of opposition.

To every part-time socialist who held their nose and voted Labour in July, only to watch Starmer piss away a historic mandate like a Tory on a pub crawl, how does it feel to witness a masterclass in betrayal, incompetence, and spineless capitulation to the very forces Starmer once pretended to oppose, safe in the knowledge that YOU enabled it?

The Starmerites can’t even call it a blip because they know, deep down, it is the death rattle of a fraud. We are approaching the finale of Keir Starmer’s self-scripted tragedy, and with his own approval ratings down the pan and his gutless party fractured beyond recognition, justice feels poetic.

Starmer’s beige apocalypse meltdown has been truly remarkable. Plots, leaks, infighting, and a popularity plunge so steep it would make a cliff abseiler blush.

Starmer’s not governing, he’s disintegrating, and I, for one, will dance on the ashes of his unforgivable betrayal.

Featured image via the Canary

By Rachael Swindon

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