The DC sandwich guy has been charged with assault for shouting at a CBP officer, throwing a sub into his chest, and then running off.
“I did it. I threw the sandwich,” he said while he was being processed.
By the way I know a lot of you think that’s not a serious assault but I SAW the video of that CBP agent trying to catch Dunn after getting hit with that sandwich and he was STRUGGLING like when I try to climb a third flight of stairs, look up the eggshell skull rule.
Also let me just remind you to throw any foodstuffs at the more svelte, weaselly-lookin feds because under the felony murder rule if ICE Special Agent Figgus McHiggis has a massive coronary lumbering down the street after you hit him with a Ding-Dong your ass is going down for MURDER son.
Also, protip: Do NOT let Subway or Jersey Mike’s or whatever cut your sandwich in half, even if it IS a large. Because if it’s in two pieces under Pam Bondi’s charging memo that’s two predicate acts and you know what that means. RICO.
Also nobody has, as of yet, that I can see, slowed down the footage of my dude throwing the sandwich at the cop and set it to Barber’s Adagio for Strings like in Platoon and SON I AM DISAPPOINT.
By the way: in case there is any ambiguity, or someone is tempted so say “Ken seems to be” or “Ken is arguably”…
I am absolutely mocking a federal law enforcement officer for getting hit in the body armor with a sandwich. You can quote me. I am 100% doing that.
Because, you know, both right-wing assholes and useless apologists and minimizers are going to be yelling YOU ARE ENCOURAGING VIOLENCE AGAINST LAW ENFORCEMENT. Asshole, I am encouraging performative defiance of thugs lawlessly deployed to intimidate civilians.
In short, I strongly support gestures of contempt and disrespect for the people carrying out the regime’s lawless and contemptible orders, notwithstanding the expectations imposed by our squalid and obsequious cop-fluffing culture.
They suck and they should know we know they suck.
Previously, previously, previously, previously, previously, previously, previously, previously, previously, previously, previously, previously, previously.
From jwz via this RSS feed