In a historic ceremony, Donald J. Trump signs over the deed to Mar-a-Lago to the Emir of Qatar. Photo: Win McNamee/Getty Images

DOHA, QATAR (The Borowitz Report)—In a major setback for Donald J. Trump, on Wednesday the Emir of Qatar demanded that the Idaho airbase his nation had been promised be built at Mar-a-Lago instead.

In a heated exchange, Sheikh Tamim bin Hamad Al Thani reportedly told Trump, “We gave you a 400-million-dollar 747. You’re not sticking us in some Idaho shithole.”

Just hours after Trump caved, national security experts expressed alarm at the Qataris’ move to Mar-a-Lago, warning that they would have access to highly sensitive classified documents stored in the club’s public bathrooms.

For his part, the Emir promised to make “major upgrades” to Trump’s club, starting by fumigating it for bedbugs.

As corporate media bend their knee to our senile wannabe dictator, I have never been more grateful that I don’t work for one of these craven companies. I work for you.

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